Ashly's Blog

Yep, that's right!  A Girl's Guide to Being Friends With Girls has moved!  The column will now run exclusively on a Wordpress blog.

The update schedule will remain the same and we'll be getting set-up to take questions over there ASAP. 

Come join us!  You know you wanna.

Last night at the 2012 Winter X-Games, Shaun White made history: he became the first athlete ever to five-peat in Snowboard Superpipe.  Oh, and he did that with another first: White's victory lap run scored him a perfect 100, the first time that's ever happened in any Winter X-Games event.

Oh, right.  And this was coming off of an ankle injury that kept him from competing in Slopestyle.

And so, I present a Shaun White appreciation post.  Here is Shaun White.  Appreciate him.

What do you consider "promiscuous?"

By that, I mean, at what point does a girl go from having a normal amount of sex to being promiscuous?  What number qualifies her for that title?

Guess what: there is no answer to that question.  Oh, there might be a personal definition that differs from person to person, but there's nothing universal.  Some people might think 10 or more people makes you promiscuous.  Some might think it's more than 2.  And there's some people that are going to say if you have sex with anyone before you're married, you're promiscuous.

Makes it a little confusing, huh?

So then, why the hell does the world teach us girls to attack each other (and sometimes ourselves) over our perceptions of promiscuity? 

I don't know,  But I know it sucks.

Why Does Everyone Care About Your Lady Business?

There are a lot of places that put a lot of emphasis on virginity and purity, as if it is all a girl is worth. 

There are a lot of places that put a lot of emphasis on being sexy/sexual, as if your willingness to have sex is all you are worth.

You are being sent these messages at the exact same time. 

I do not blame you if you feel confused.

I've talked about this in other places, but I want to address it directly in this column: your virginity is YOUR VIRGINITY.  You wanna keep it?  Keep it.  There's nothing wrong with that.  You wanna lose it?  Be safe about it.  There's also nothing wrong with that.  You are the only one who gets to decide how important it is to you. 

And that's TO YOU.  Nobody else's sex life is your business.  Real or perceived.

Perception Versus Reality

Someone being sexy doesn't mean they're having sex.

Pretty simple, right?  Except for the part where we tend to associate one with the other automatically.  Girl wearing something that shows off her cleavage or legs?  Slut.  Girl confidently talking with a group of guys?  Whore.  Girl taking sexy pictures of herself?  Slutty Slut Slut Slut.  Girl dating a guy you're into?  Hobag.

It's not really our fault.  Like I always try to point out, that's the message we're sent. Boys want girls who act sexy!  But they won't want girls who give it away too easily, and those are girls who act/dress sexy!  You need boys to like you!

You can chase the circular logic all you want.  It will never make sense. So what do you do?

What You Do

You stop calling other girls "sluts" and "whores."  Just stop it.  I don't care if, in your opinion, they are sleeping with "too many" people.  That's not your call to make.

Besides, you need to realize that promiscuity isn't a bad thing.  It's not for everyone, obviously, and I am going to stress AGAIN the importance of safe sex.  But just because someone else enjoys having sex with a lot of different partners doesn't affect you.  You have sex with who you want to have sex with (or don't have sex) and let them do as they will. 

And as always, keep away from generalizations.  Not "all girls" are one way or another.  Be yourself, recognize that other girls are being themselves and go with that.

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Blink-182 fans, have no fear.  You will not have to suffer another 8-year span between albums.

Because while Blink's Neighborhoods only released last September, Mark Hoppus has revealed in an interview that he is writing new music for Blink-182.  And ONLY for Blink-182.  Well, with the exception of one-off projects like his collaboration with Pete Wentz for the Almost Alice album, but the point remains.

So, what kind of sound could we expect from these?  39-year-old Hoppus says it's too soon to tell.  "At the moment all I've got is a bunch of chord progressions and ideas. It's more me playing my guitar and coming up with little ideas and melodies. By the time it goes to Tom and Travis and we work on it as a band, who knows what it will sound like."

In the meantime, Blink will be hitting the road this summer in Europe alongside the All-American Rejects, Four Year Strong and more.

We're only a few weeks away from Valentine's Day, and you know what that means: mushy cards, heart-shaped boxes of chocolate and plenty of advertising designed to make single people insecure over our singlehood.

Well, to make it all suck a little less, Hopeless Records is currently offering a free compliation for your downloading pleasure. And even better, it features bands like There For Tomorrow, Enter Shikari, The Used, We Are The In Crowd and, yep, Yellowcard.  Here's the full track listing:

1.     “Sing For Me” - Yellowcard
2.     “Exits and Entrances” - We Are The In Crowd
3.     “Hoodie Weather” - The Wonder Years
4.     “Sssnakepit” - Enter Shikari
5.     “I Come Alive” - The Used
6.     “Forget Your Heart” - Silverstein
7.     “Siren” - The Dangerous Summer
8.     “Face To Face” - Divided By Friday
9.     “The Joyride” - There For Tomorrow
10.    “Dead” - Samiam from “Trips”
11.    “Let My Love” - Damion Suomi & The Minor Prophets
12.    “Useless” - Anarbor
13.    “Some Things” - For The Foxes

You can download the 13 track album for free over on Facebook.

Want more V-day music?  Check out my playlists from last year, featuring music for singles, the scorned, a little wink-wink-nudge-nudge and genuine romantics.

With the birth of their daughter Blue Ivy, proud parents Jay-Z and Beyonce are in for some major life changes.

But one of those changes may have nothing to do with diaper duty and sleepless nights.  A poem is circulating the internet, supposedly written by 42-year-old Jay-Z, stating that he will no longer use the word "bitch" in his music because of his daughter (who he's already "recorded" a song with, FYI).

The poem states that while Hova may have been okay with using the word previously, his daughter has given him a new perspective: "No man will degrade her, or call her name. I'm so focused on your future, the degradation has passed. I wish you wealth, health and insight. Forever young you may pass. Blue Ivy Carter, my angel."

Interesting?  Yes.  True?  Well...jury's out.  Remember, question EVERYTHING you find on the internet.

See, the poem hasn't actually appeared on anything officially tied to Jay-Z and he hasn't stepped forward to take credit for it.  Basically, this could be a huge hoax...that's managed to fool NME.

What do you guys think?  Hoax or not?

Okay, okay.  So they won't actually be stepping into a wrestling ring, but last night Mikey Way and Ray Toro of My Chemical Romance were spotted in the audience at WWE RAW.

Mikey, 31, and Ray, 34, had prime seating right behind the annoucers table (for an idea of how close to the ring this is, check out the picture Mikey tweeted of WWE Superstar John Cena).  This means that they not only got a great view of the in-ring action, it ALSO means that they popped up on camera a few times.  But their best moment of the night?  Had to have been when they were shaking hands with Chris Jericho (a rockstar in his own right, check out Xander's badass interivew with the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla).  And luckily, I have some low-quality screen caps. 

Just what you've always wanted, right?

Anyway:

The guys are both excited to see Jericho's in-ring return (which turned out...interesting to say the least, as fans will attest).

Ray goes in for the handshake and proves that you're never too old or too famous to mark out (marking out is basically reacting like something in wrestling is real, even though you know it's fake.  Trust me, there's an entire language to pro-wrestling).

Ray ALSO goes for the backpat

And then sticks out his tongue.  I don't know why.

Oh, and they weren't the only celebs at RAW that night.  See that bald guy?

That's Mr. Belding from Saved by the Bell.  I kid you not.  He's a huge wrestling fan.

Mikey and Ray were likely enjoying some downtime before the band is set to head into the studio to record a new album.  WITHOUT giving us that final Killjoys video.  Yes, I will keep bringing that point up and you can't stop me.  Even WITH a steel chair.

Since Fall Out Boy decided to take a break, Joe Trohman has been keeping busy with his group The Damned Things.  The metal group also consisted of fellow FOB member Andy Hurley on drums, as well as members of Every Time I Die and Anthrax.

Well, first the bad news: because of ETID and Anthrax's busy schedule, it sounds like we won't be hearing much in 2012 from The Damned Things.

Now the good news: you will, however, be hearing things from 27-year-old Trohman: he along with fellow Damned Things alumni Josh Newton will be starting a new group: With Knives.  In his own words: "With Knives began as a project Josh was working on on his own. When he joined TDT, he asked me to work on it with him, and so I did. It sounded a bit too realized to not turn it into an actual band. That’s what we’re doing with it."

The band has already recorded an EP which will be released digitally through Son of Man, which they are looking to use almost as an indie label to help some other musicians release their work as well.  Joe says "Hopefully we will be able to work with other artists and musicians to collaborate and release their stuff in a safe, DIY environment that doesn’t push them to do anything they don’t want to do."

What do you guys think?

Breaking news: some of us over here on Buzznet are fans of Pete Wentz.

Okay, that's not breaking news, and there's not really any breaking news in this interview that Wentz, 32, did with CNN.com, but he does address Fall Out Boy, Black Cards and more in this short sit down with CNN.

Our biggest question: are we still going to see a Black Cards album considering the changes in the band's line-up and style?

Fans were fairly surprised when news broke that Black Cards had parted ways with their vocalist Bebe Rexha.  The news came after Black Cards had released a series of remixes and Bebe had unveiled a new solo song entitled "Champagne."

With little to go on, fans began to speculate on what had happened.  In an industry where splits can be sudden and volitile, nobody was quite sure if everything was okay between the current and former members of the band.

Don't worry.  It is.

Both 22-year-old Bebe and Pete Wentz, the band's founder/lyricist/bassist/DJ/whatever, have commented on the line-up change and the future of their respective projects.

Bebe posted to her Facebook page to let fans know that there's no beef between her and Black Cards.

A lot of fans have been asking me about my status in Black Cards, so I thought I'd clear the air. My depart from black cards was a mutual decision between the boys and I. I will support Pete and Spencer 100% in everything that they do. They will always be my homies. I wanna thank the fans for making this the best year EVER. I love you and you'll be hearing more from me soon. I hope you join the movement.

Definitely reassuring (personally I'm looking forward to hearing more of Bebe's solo work), but what about commentary from the other end of things?  Well, 32-year-old Pete took to the Black Cards Facebook page to say things in a very Pete Wentz fashion:

It started out as friends. Never planned to do much of anything. I’d scribble my thoughts down and my friend sam would put them to music. In the studio next door to sams, we heard bebe and grant working on songs and the black cards collective was born. I got my friends spencer and nate involved so we could play live. We played a few shows and people started to take notice. Bebe started getting calls to write with all the producers in ny and la. Spencer and I started fucking around with people’s accapellas for fun. We remixed our friends records, cobra, anjulie and gym class. Then we remixed rihanna and major lazer, then we went to #1 on hype machine. Life felt fun again. Having to get myself through a toxic cloud that was the past year of my life was important. The homies that have been a part of black cards will still be homies. I needed to feel like myself again. Good news is that I do. I appreciate everyone who has been a part of this journey and there are songs that you still will get a chance to hear and we will be coming through your city to steal your puppies and turn your brains to mush.

So bebe was writing with producers and we were hijacking other producers.

Pete goes on to encourage fans to follow Bebe's solo work as well as plugging BC's upcoming mixtape. He finished with a reassuring statement: "The black cards are dead. Long live the black cards."

I don't think I can end on a better note than that.

(EDIT: CRAP, we had Bebe's age listed as 27, it's actually 22.  Sorry about that!)